Sometimes I think I was
born in the wrong century because I love the idea of getting around by horse
and buggy. I enjoy such movies as Pride and Prejudice, Gone with the
Wind, Little Women, The Anne of Green Gables series, and Little House on the
Prairie. With this in mind try to picture with me a horse and buggy. The buggy is my life and the horse pulling it
is of my choosing. It is good when
I am pulling my own buggy because I am likely to be doing what I want and
getting where I need to be. Sometimes I can pull the buggy
but I don't always know the way to go and even if I do I get tired
doing it on my own. It is best when the lead horse is Jesus and I
keep my eyes on Him and can trust He is leading me in the right direction. In
truth my buggy is often being pulled by a horse that is other people. How
often I allow others to pull my buggy where they think I should be going or
more correctly where I think they think I should be going.
An example of this is when
I hitch my buggy to my mother in a given situation. If I look I will see she is
hitched backwards and does not even see where I need to go and
where she thinks I should be is nowhere near where we are and I end up in
the wrong place every time because it is what she wants or thinks is
right. It is no wonder that when fear and doubt are pulling my buggy I am
squeezing my eyes closed in denial in hope that the approaching cliff will
disappear. If I stop long enough to ask myself "What do I
want?" I will see what I need and where I need to go and can take my buggy
to that place better than going wherever or being whatever I think others
want me to be, or doing what I think others want me to do. When I
am looking to others to lead my life and make me happy I will never
get where I really want to go or need to be for me. Having
others along for the ride in my buggy is wonderful and can be enjoyable
but the moment I try to put them in the yoke with me it is likely to be
only conflict and misery for me. It is best when Jesus is the lead
horse of my buggy with me following in His footsteps, but it is a matter of
trust and faith that sometimes I only have enough of for the gentle hand of God
to walk along holding the bridle.
When
I get that unsettling feeling I am doing something for the wrong reason or for
the wrong person I have to stop (sometimes literally stop pacing) and ask
"Who is pulling my buggy?" The pull of the buggy is the
"why" motive for what I am doing. It is the one I am trusting
at the moment. Sometimes I am trusting myself and reasoning and/or my
fleeting emotions, other times I can be putting my trust in the wrong person
and by trusting their opinion more than my own, or God's. We really only
have one life to live and wouldn't it be great to live it to the fullest with
joy and adventure. The great thing about pulling my own buggy is that if
I end up making a wrong turn I can turn around and try again and it can mark it
up to a learning experience and not blame others since we can’t control others
anyway. The road is going to have pot holes full of trials and the wheels
are going to get broken but that doesn't make it impossible to keep going....
it’s sometimes painful and very difficult but worth it to set us free to be
ourselves. No one but you should be
pulling your buggy or in other words that are more modern, “You are the only
one that can live your life” to the fullest satisfaction.
